A Pouch Full Of Monkeyshines
by Dean's Bakery
Summary: Another effort made to polish my humor writing skills. After Dean set Gabriel free from the circle of flaming holy oil (S5x08), the archangel decides to pursue Team Free Will to give them a dose of Changing Channels v 2.0 without venturing back to TV Land. No spoilers unless you don't know Gabriel at all and a few small references to said episode. My first fic on Gabriel!
1. Chapter 1- You Never Know Who's Watching

**Hello :) this is my first attempt at writing a fic revolving around The Trickster a.k.a. Gabriel. As I have said earlier, humor is not my forte but I enjoy reading crack fics and their affiliates :D**

**Here's my sincere shot at trying to capture the Trickster's awesome mind and how he sees the world through his brandy-hazel eyes… do let me know what you think about it in your reviews.**

**If it captures your interest, I'll continue this to make it into the short series I originally planned it to be!**

**Enjoy :)**

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**A Pouch Full Of Monkeyshines.**

Never ever piss off an archangel.

Especially an archangel that has been masquerading as Loki for eons of Earth years.

_It was a grim day on which you thought you had bested me, boys. Not excluding you too, little brother,_ Gabriel thought with vengeful relish as he watched the two hunters and their angel friend talking discreetly over their take-out dinner in the nocturnal diner. That seemed a feat out of the ordinary for them, especially Castiel. The boys hardly ever ate their dinner outside, and Castiel, well, he was never known to eat.

_If any heavenly resident had accomplished the very human act of eating, and also managed to develope a taste for their confectionaries it was The Mighty Trickster,_ Gabriel thought gleefully.

Out of his very unobvious hiding place, behind the snack counter in the guise of a buck-toothed and acne-ridden teenager, he took his own time in studying the Winchesters and his own younger brother as he plotted and schemed to get back at them for the time they had trapped him in a circle of holy oil. It had been right after he had put them on a wild charade of TV Land.

A satisfied, wishful look came over the buck-toothed snack counter employee's face as he reminisced about those entertaining pranks he had pulled. He had done it to take them out of their Apocalypsified (he'd have to trick the Oxford guys to include this word in their next edition) world and also try to make them understand why he'd chosen to leave his family.

A slight movement from the angel's side of the table in the booth he was sharing with the hunting brothers caught the renegade archangel's eye. He looked on in utter surprise as Castiel picked up a fry, broke a piece from the top of it with his other hand and put it in his mouth proceeding to chew it in slow, deliberate mastication with a wary bearing on his face and a scrutinizing look in his eyes. The older archangel looked on in astonishment as he continued to watch and saw the trench coat cladded angel nod his head in a wordless approval of the aforementioned fried snack and after finishing the one he held, he went for another one.

The older Winchester grinned in victory over getting to humanize the angel in regard to yet another aspect as he selflessly pushed the plate of greasy french-fries towards the obliging angel.

Out of his noble character and disposition to be concerned about all the people who were dear to his charge, the blue-eyed angel offered some to the younger Winchester who only shook his head in polite refusal before sending an eloquent glare towards his older brother. The angel shrugged before diving into the crunchy morsels of the greasily saturated potato sticks before a peaceful face reigned over his countenance.

The archangel stared in disbelief. _Oh my little Cassy, what have they done to you?_

On second thought, a nefarious grin took over the previously surprised features of the pimply-faced with his-teeth-knocked-out-of-oblivion youngster's face. He rubbed his palms together as the ideas began to pop up in his mind.

One should never trap the Trickster and then set him free thinking there'd be no consequences, ever.

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**Thank you for reading. Please take a couple of minutes to drop your feedback :)**

**Should I continue?**


	2. Chapter 2- Looking Through Another's Eye

**Thank you so much for the lovely reviews everyone :) I hope I do justice to every character, especially Gabriel since its my first time writing him! It was challenging as well as stimulating to try and grasp his vibrant frame of mind and put down my ideas.**

**I started this story to polish my writing skills and also to teach myself to write shorter (and equally expressive) chapters. *sigh* I don't know how I ended up crossing a word count of more than 3,000, again… I wanted to make this a series of short and interesting events. Oh well :) hope its just as nice!**

**Disclaimer- I don't own anything. It would be great to have a paintball tournament with the guys though! One can dream :D**

**Enjoy and please, please, please don't forget to review!**

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One should never trap the Trickster and then set him free thinking there'd be no consequences, ever.

And so it began.

**Getting back at two hunters and one celestial warrior who dared to step on an archangel's hallowed toes: Phase- I.**

Identity swap is always fun. The Trickster nodded in approval at his own proposal, surveying the vicinity of the vacant motel's parking yard and snapped his fingers in the unmistakable impression of a charming magician. He must have fancied himself as one of them too, as it would have been evident by any bystander- had there been one. He swished his bloody crimson appeared-out-of-thin-air velvet cape around himself as he briskly walked away from the place in a discreet fashion with the added flair of a departing artist's swagger.

With an expert flick of his right wrist, the charlatan being tossed something akin to fluorescent (magical?) dust towards a particular motel room without even looking back.

The cloud of glittery dust wafted and turned, looped and swooped till it slipped under the gap below the door and flitted around the room before hovering over the occupants in three wispy ribbons. It seemed to tickle them on the sensitive skin of their forehead and cheeks as the slumbering figures tried to brush the ghostly tendrils off. The dusty ribbons then floated upwards where they met at a cobweb-free spot and intertwined among themselves, their glittery sheen radiating in vigor and panache. Just as the only non-mortal one of the room's occupants began to stir from his passive state, the shimmering mass once again divided into three ghostly strands and invaded their respiratory crevices just as each of the occupants began another random motion of inhalation.

The sleeping figurers jerked in their places for a fraction of a second before resuming their sleep except for the immortal one whose oceanic eyes snapped open and he jumped to his feet, taking on a fighting stance. Sapphire irises flicked in every direction, trying to identify the potential invasion.

Nothing.

A glance at the two sleeping mortals, a slight confused tilt of the head, a quick peek at the salt lines… no, it was all fine. The blue-eyed creature sat back down and continued his watch. However, he couldn't help but wonder… _had I fallen asleep?_ And the query worried him a great deal, since he was not supposed to sleep. Not ever.

The shimmery wisps which had entered each of the occupants suddenly shone inside them, making their physical bodies glow momentarily before the prior darkness returned again. The sapphire irises were hidden behind tired eyelids so they didn't catch the momentary radiance.

Outside, the caped figure smiled in satisfaction as he felt the happenings in the room. He still was a long way from accomplishing the musings on his list but this was a start. Making sure that there was no one around, he waved his arms in exaggerated gestures in the empty space before him and conjured an eight-legged steed upon which he intended to make his grand exodus.

He still had an hour before sunrise when the occupants of the room would arise. Till then, he was going to raid some over-night candy store in the guise of the murderous possessed toddler from the superhit horror movie series. The scaring would be just for fun. He wasn't going to harm anyone so long as they gave him sweet stuff.

**An hour later, in the previously mentioned motel room.**

Dean raised a heavy, lumbering arm and wiped his sleepy eyes with the back of his hand. He yawned and stretched, wondering why his butt and lower back felt more sore than usual. He didn't remember doing anything out of the ordinary the previous night. _Hmph. Whatever…_

He turned his head on one side to look at his younger brother. He had to check on him and make sure he was safely tucked in his bed even if he was all grown up now. It was the first thing he did every morning. As his squinty hazel eyes moved into focus, fighting against the protest of sleep, his neat-yet-masculine (he refused to call them elegant) eye-brows crashed together in a suspicious frown.

His brother, or rather his brother's bed along with him was not there. With lightning speed he vaulted himself off his resting place and threw a threatening glance on his other side, only to feel instant relief.

Sasquatch Sammy was snoring lightly under the rumpled blanket with one lanky leg splayed out, hanging over the edge of the mattress.

_Phew. Had a real scare._ He admitted silently as he stretched leisurely and turned towards the bathroom. And this time he frowned in confusion. He was sure that when he had used the bathroom the last night, it was on his right. Now there was a vacant wall.

_What the hell…_

He took a step forward to check if he had been right or if he was dreaming, when his other foot tripped on something and he went tumbling to the ground in a crashing heap.

Some loose fabric went down along with him and essentially covered his face hindering his line of sight. He heard a startled jerk from his brother's bed followed by a muffled cry of surprise.

_Shit. He's up._

"_**Wha- Who? De-Dean! Are you alright?" **_Sam's urgent call was half-muffled by his still-drowsy bearing.

It fell silent for a while during which Sam realized he couldn't see his brother anywhere.

"_**DEAN! WHERE ARE YOU?!"**_

"_Down here, moron."_

A few shuffling footsteps and a sigh of relief.

"_Dude, you scared me. What are you doing on the floor?"_

"_I'm taking a shower. Don't you dare come in."_ Dean's voice was calm before they raised in pitch, _**"What does it look like I am doing on the floor? I tripped and fell down, idiot!"**_

"_Geez… what's wrong with you sunshine?"_ Sam's petulant pout could be felt in his voice. _"Hey, isn't that Cas's coat?"_

"_What coat?"_

Sam kneeled down, reached out and picked up the offending fabric off Dean's face. He could see again. Woopee.

"_**This** coat."_

Dean turned over on his back and sat up, before looking at the material in his brother's hand. It was feathery ass's ugly coat, alright.

"_Uh… are you feeling alright? I could swear you sounded just like Dean…"_ Sam's voice sounded different after his hearing and vision was freed of the muffling obstruction. He slowly turned his head upwards, only for his eyes to meet the concerned hazel eyes of his brot-

It took a second to register in his mind that he was looking at the face of a very handsome man. Not his brother. A very handsome man who was also vaguely familiar…

_Why, _Dean thought to himself as he grinned cockily, _he's almost as good-looking as me._

"_Cas? What are you staring at me like that for?"_ the good-looking man asked awkwardly.

_Eh? Cas? Me?_ Dean thought confusedly.

And then it hit him. It was a bloody shifter. Again.

Dean re-affirmed his glare at the handsome man who put on a real good show of looking genuinely concerned and at present, genuinely confused.

"_Why are you glaring at-"_

The man never got to complete his sentence as Dean's mallet of a fist his him square in the crook of his jaw and fell backwards.

Gnashing his teeth, Dean jumped to his feet and waited for the handsome man to recover.

"_**How many times are your kind going to wear my face?! Damned shifters!"**_

The handsome man didn't get up immediately but he wore a sincerely hurt expression on his face. This angered Dean even more. He moved to punch him again but stopped when he heard the handsome man speak.

"_Man… that was a solid one. What the hell is wrong with you Cas?"_ the handsome man whined, _"I swear if this is a prank set up by Dean, I can't say how shocked I am that he actually convinced you to pull this off… ow, my face…"_

"_**That's my face, you bastard!"**_

And as Dean reached down to grab the throat of the man who was wearing his face, his eyes landed on his hand. His fair, smooth, blemish-free and un-tanned hand. He switched to look at his other hand and with mounting trepidation, realized that they weren't his… they weren't the hands he remembered he had.

He looked at himself, utterly confused to see that he was dressed in a dark suit complete with a tie hanging askew. His arms were layered in another tan colored item of clothing. With increasing horror he realized he was dressed in Castiel's- no, Jimmy's, he corrected himself- no, Castiel's, he corrected himself again (since it was the angel's consciousness that was dominant) clothes.

And those pale hands looked like the feathery dude's too… his hands flew up to his head where they got entangled with the curly strands that were alien to his sensations.

_How? When? Whyyyyyy?_ His breathe came out in panicky hitches as he placed his- no Castiel's- hands on his- no Castiel's- chest to steady himself. _When I look in the mirror, I better still look like me…_

A deep-pitched scream jolted him back to reality. The shifter wearing his face was shrieking in sheer terror, pointing towards the other bed, on which he'd supposedly slept. But it was further away from the door so it had to be Sam's bed.

_**Sam! **_Dean jumped, suddenly realizing he had been too busy talking with his doppelganger that he'd forgotten to check if his brother was alright. However, he sighed in relief when he saw his gigantic brother sitting up in bed with an extremely puzzled look on his face. The expression looked nearly out of character for him, but Dean attributed it to the shifter's ear-piercing screech that had stunned his brother out of his slumber. The brown wavy locks were all over his face and he looked as if he had been through a blender.

"_**What the hell are you?!" **_the shifter still wearing Dean's face demanded from the sleepy looking Sam as it held a bottle of holy water and a silver knife in his hands threateningly.

Dean was aghast. Had they grown resistant to silver like mosquitoes had gotten used to DDT?!

Sleepy Sam reached for his hair and tried to get the locks in one place, all while looking incredibly lost. He paid no heed to Shifter Dean who was yelling more warnings as every second ticked by. He only seemed interested in himself… or rather his long and unending legs, staring at them as if he was seeing them for the first time.

He stood up on his feet, slowly raising his eyes to look at the other two men. He took a few unsteady steps and stopped when Shifter Dean threatened to shoot him. Sleepy Sam tilted his head in habitual likeness of someone they were very much aware of.

"_It looks like we have a troublesome situation at hand."_ He spoke finally, _"I can tell my brother Gabriel has been here."_

Shifter Dean and the other guy knowing himself to be Dean but was in Castiel's clothes turned to look at each other before making a mad dash for the full-length mirror in the bathroom.

Sleepy Sam looked on at the tiny puff of dust the two bumbling bodies had left behind that was extremely reminiscent of a typical _Roadrunner _episode. The little cloud seemed to take on an anthropomorphic face and snigger at him before vanishing in a silent poof. His eyes widened for an instant as he finally realized what the Trickster had done.

Complete body swap between the members of Team Free Will.

So if he had indeed seen Jimmy Novak swinging a solid one at Shifter Dean, Sleepy Sam realized with a fast escalating crabbiness, that Jimmy was Dean and Dean was Sam. That explained his long limbs that seemed to have stretched overnight.

He frowned, wondering how it was even possible for him to occupy Sam's body without the angel asking for his permission first. Angels do need the consent of their vessels. Speaking of which, Sam was actually Lucifer's vessel. Then how come he, Castiel, was currently residing in the younger Winchester's body?

On second thought, Gabriel could do anything he pleased. He had been just this annoying even when they were fledglings. His lunatic archangel big brother just didn't play fair. And now with his status as Loki merged with his inherent archangel powers, he was going to be a nasty pain in the butt.

Castiel, as Sam, decided he might as well look at the mirror. He found it a little difficult to maneuver the sudden long legs and he waddled clumsily at first. After his gait smoothened out a bit and he began to fall in stride, he nearly jumped in wild terror to land on the ceiling owing to the sharp yelps of surprise and shrieks of horror that thundered from the bathroom's confines.

_Oh. They are having a mini-apocalyptic fit._ Castiel thought plainly as he slammed a hand to calm his- no Sam's- heart hammering against his ribs. _The boy's got the robust heart of an ox._

Castiel decided to leave the brothers to their newest discoveries as he sat back down on the bed. He might as well watch some TV. For some reason he felt more refreshed than he had ever been. He accredited it to having laid down horizontally in bed rather than his vertical watch at the chair.

_Well,_ he mused, _Dean will surely have a sore back._ He hoped he wouldn't have to deal with a sulky Dean because of that. The angel just couldn't handle it when his ward got like that. He'd use the most ridiculous notions and weirdest phrases out of the celestial being's database of human references.

He found a channel with a TV evangelist on it and he put down the remote. _At least there were a few mortals who still preached of his father._

From inside the bathroom a barrage of grievances and protests resonated off the tiled walls. Apparently the cemented surfaces weren't acoustic.

Sam (as Dean)- _**"I got beer breath! Yuck!"**_

Dean (as Castiel)- _**"My hair! It's gone! I got coppery wires instead!"**_

Sam (as Dean)- _**"Well my hair's gone too and all I got left is a trimmed grass lawn! Never liked your style and now I'm stuck with it!"**_

Dean (as Castiel)- _**"Hey my hair's awesome! Yours is the untamed jungle Sasquatch! **__And oh, newsflash, Sammy.__** You're short, ha ha."**_

Sam (as Dean)- _"Oh really? Guess what Dean?__** YOU are still SHORTER, mwa ha ha."**_

Dean (as Castiel)- _**"Thank your lucky stars Sam, that you got the handsome face and sexy body from among the two of us!**_

Sam (as Dean)- _"Well, look at you. Not that Jimmy is bad-looking but he reminds me of an awesome song, ya know?"_

Dean (as Castiel)- _"Oh yeah?"_

Sam (as Dean)- _"Yeah. It goes like this-"_

And Sam, in Dean's body, took on a notorious grin as he began to sing in his brother's vocals.

"_Curly hair, very fair  
Eyes are blue, lovely too!  
Heaven's pet-  
Isn't that you?"_

He even had the atrocity to pat Dean, in Castiel's vessel, on the crown. The older brother was livid.

Dean (as Castiel)- _"You do realize you just declared war?"_

Sam (as Dean)- _"Oh please, you weren't ever scary and you aren't doing a very good job at being terrifying even now."_

Dean (as Castiel)- _"You don't do justice to my body. I'm worried you'll scare away all the hot chicks with your bitchy tantrums."_

Sam (as Dean)- _"I might. After all, I'm wearing the __**PRETTY **__brother… and honestly, this look kinda suits you better, __**Deanie Weanie**__."_

Dean (as Castiel)- _**"I'm not pretty! You're girlie!"**_

Sam (as Dean)- _**"And you're a bow-legged pigeon!"**_

Dean (as Castiel)- _**"Chicks dig them!"**_

Sam (as Dean)- _**"Hah! Probably because it makes you look like a bumbling fool and easy to prey upon!"**_

Dean as Castiel looked fit to explode. _**"I am a hunter, I prey!"**_

"_**Yeah, a big time dumbass hunter who clocked me first thing in the morning!"**_

"_**How was I s'posed to know I was you?!"**_

"_**I don't know! At least it's your face that'll bruise… jerk!"**_

"_**Bitch!"**_

"_**Jerk!"**_

"_**Bitch!"**_

"_**Jerk!"**_

'Cas' rattled off a string of expletives and pulled a dozen funny faces at 'Dean' who looked mortified. _**"How's that, Bitch!"**_

"_Gawd, dude… if I hadn't known it's you in Cas's body I'd have probably had a heart attack with the stunts you just pulled. I can't imagine Cas ever doing all that…"_

"_Not the time to go all softie-woftie Sammy. I gotta have my body back. It's stifling in Cas's clothes… wonder how he carries all this weight around…and, oh-"_ 'Dean' picked up a length of the trench-coat's belt that had reached the floor in an uneven length, _"I must have tripped on this… son of a bitch…"_

"_Have you finished your explorations and discoveries?"_ a voice asked from the sleeping area of the motel room.

Both brothers looked at each other. Green meeting, oddly, blue. A simultaneous sigh of defeat.

"_Yeah."_ 'Dean' mumbled.

"_Be right out."_ 'Cas' replied.

They walked out of the bathroom and saw 'Sam' staring in an uncharacteristically stoic manner at them.

"_So…"_ the brothers, each displaced out of their bodies, said together.

"_Gabriel has done this to us."_

"_Are you sure?"_ Sam asked. Dean couldn't help but roll his- Jimmy's- eyes while his brother seated **his** butt on the other bed.

"_Geez, Sammy who else would want to do this?"_ Dean shuffled over to his side and sat down. _Man, this stupid trench-coat hinders free movement,_ he observed, _it's like being trussed up in a blanket._

Sam scowled at his brother before turning back to Castiel. It was weird to look at his own face for a solution to their predicament.

Before Castiel could answer, an evil cackle boomed through the motel room and all of them, except for Castiel in Sam's body, jumped violently.

A tiny rainbow-colored sparrow that was attired in a silken scarf and a fedora hat and eating popcorn out of a bucket scaled down to its size, darted and flew around the room before settling on the TV's antennae.

"_What the hell?"_ Dean frowned and narrowed his vessel's blue eyes to get a better look.

"_Hey Dean-o. Missed me?"_ the tiny thing chirped, _"Howdy Sam. And you too, little brother! Like my handiwork?"_

"_Gabriel."_ Castiel nodded and stood up. _"We were just talking about you."_

A tiny shrill sound echoed across the recesses of the room. The colorful sparrow picked up a microscopic cell phone from his equally tiny belt and read the text.

"_Oh darn. Gotta go my darlings, the Bermuda guys need my help."_ Gabriel informed them with no more casual concern than he was showing to the corn kernels in his miniature popcorn bucket.

"_Gabriel, wait."_ Castiel, deciding it was upto him to talk some sense into his prankster brother, took the bold initiative.

"_No can do baby bro, you take care of your roomies 'coz I have important things to attend to. Toodles!"_

The vibrant sparrow shook its little tail at them and tipped its tiny hat towards them before disappearing in a mini clap of thunder. It left a tiny burnt spot on the top of the TV.

"_When I get my hands on your flimsy feathers, I'm gonna pluck them all and then rip you apart and roast you alive…"_ Dean swore under his breath.

There was a burst of bright light just above the heads and a rolled up scroll floated down to Dean's open palm. He undid the ridiculously hot pink ribbon holding the scroll together and turned flaming red when he read what was written on it.

"_**Son of a bitch!"**_ Dean threw the scroll on the floor and grabbed his keys from his jacket's pocket. In less than five seconds he was out and they could hear the rumble of the Impala in the next five that followed.

Sam picked up the creased letter and read the words on it. With his newly added height, Castiel loomed over the younger Winchester and read the same.

"_Does my big brother harbor deep affection for your big brother?"_ the ever clueless angel asked and Sam groaned before palming his face.

_**My Dear Deano**_

_**You'll NEVER catch me.**_

_**You're most welcome to try and catch my ass though! I'll be waiting for you and your rusty wagon, if you can ever catch up to me!**_

_**Oooooh, and make the chase interesting!**_

_**Till we meet again, my anti-apocalyptic sweetheart!**_

_**Love,  
Gabe the Babe.**_

_**XOXOXO**_

Dean better not catch any sparrows for interrogation.

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**Was it rare, medium or overdone? Answer in feedback please :)**


	3. Chapter 3- Dean The Clergyman

**Hello :) I am so flattered and humbled by the lovely response on my last chapter! I'm glad that for my first Gabriel fic I am not doing too badly :)**

**I hope you like this new addition and that it draws out a few chuckles from you, dear reader. I'm still not very used to Gabriel's amazing mind so it's kinda hard to keep up with his likely schemes :D**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Supernatural or any of its affiliates. I only own the plot of my story.**

**Please don't forget to review- they are like candy-flavored vitamins :D besides, they help me know how I am doing too.**

**Enjoy!**

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Dean better not catch any sparrows for interrogation.

Castiel and Sam, with nothing else to do in their current state, decided to get themselves some coffee and breakfast at a nearby diner. Sam found his new found craving for red meat surprising and attributed it to the fact that since he was occupying his brother's body, he was being subjected to its inherent traits and tendencies.

Castiel made some interesting discoveries too. Not only was he hungry, he was dying to have some crispy garden-fresh salad and, owing to his angelic bearing, he couldn't have enough of the stuff even after chomping down four of the said platters. Sam suggested eating some candy to suppress his appetite, but he found the sweet taste repulsing. He pushed back the remaining to Sam, who was again surprised when he was smitten by the saccharine-rich juvenile delight. He finished all of them with gusto.

"_Looks like both our older brothers have a predisposition towards sweets and junk food, huh Cas?"_ Sam stated in a bored manner as he wrestled his tongue around in the cavity of his mouth, trying to dislodge a chunk of the chewy toffee that had stubbornly wedged itself in his back molars. He looked a lot like the real Dean while doing that.

"_They do indeed. Gabriel surely enjoys his avatar as Loki. He chose the perfect pagan deity for his second identity. They do share a notorious taste for sugary delicacies."_ Castiel replied half-absently as he eyed the leaves of the geranium blooms that were neatly arranged in a vase on their table to add a homely feel to the diner.

He felt like a rabbit whose appetite for munching on greens could go on all day. Add his new-found love for vegetables to the self-replenishing affinity of his celestial origin and he could happily sample the diverse vegetation around him for all time to come.

Sam was about to reply when he felt a light hand on his shoulder. He tipped his head to the side and saw that it was a well-manicured hand with nails that resembled talons brandishing a shade of eye-blinding electric pink.

He dared to raise his head and looked straight into the brown eyes of a young woman. She was neither pretty nor plain, but then he couldn't really tell because her actual face was hidden behind layers of heavy make-up. Her gaze was as hypnotizing as a python that was stalking its prey. About her attire, she could have done better if she had invested a bit more in a modest amount of concealing fabric rather than foundation and mascara.

Sam would've simply tried to ask her if she needed some help had the smile on her face not been so… scary. She looked like she could rip him apart with ease if she chose to. Sam gulped nervously and flinched like a terrified animal trapped in a cage when she grabbed his shoulder in a shocking amount of strength. He doubted if she was an Amazon in the guise of the petite figure.

"_Hey Handsome… I thought you said yesterday that you were leaving early this morning."_ She purred and she traced one of her talons along his jaw-line.

Sam was coming down with a panic attack and he struggled not to turn a condemning shade of beetroot red. He tried scooting away from her but she shamelessly came after him and sat down in the booth that he and Castiel were sharing.

"_Uh… e he he he… Miss, I think you have mistaken me for someone else…"_ Sam simpered at her, feeling like a complete fool. He was going to shoot his brother once they got back to normal… _if_ they ever got back to normal.

"_Aw… come now, don't be like that. We had already become well-acquainted last night."_

"_Eh?"_

She frowned, making Sam's insides shrink in an uneasy foreboding. _"Why are you shy all of a sudden? Are you with him?"_ she threw an acidic glare at Castiel who only sat stone-like, his current vessel's hazel eyes stayed unblinking as he silently observed the scene before him.

Sam was about to vehemently deny the atrocious accusation, but a tiny lantern of ideas sparked to life somewhere within the recesses of his brain and he reconsidered. Dean would face the consequences anyway, and he had a blessed opportunity of getting back at him for the uncountable pranks his older brother had played on him on earlier occasions. Well, he also played his own pranks but Dean always had the nastiest tricks up his sleeve… only the Trickster had the notoriety to out-prank Dean. Seemed justified.

Sam put on a sultry smile as he easily dislodged her grip from his shoulder and reached for Castiel's hand across the table (macho awkwardness, be damned!)

"_As a matter of fact,"_ he cooed back to the woman, _"my boyfriend and I were just getting some breakfast."_

"_Oh? But last night you told me this guy is your brother."_ She shot back.

Sam's dropped Castiel's hand and he mentally slapped himself. Great. He'd forgotten that he was in Dean's body so even if it was Castiel that was with him, to the other woman they still were brothers.

A victorious grin came over Sam's countenance as he found a plausible solution.

"_That's only for the world to hear, not know. Besides, I am into both."_ He flashed what he felt would look like his brother's haughty grin, and judging by the taken aback look on her face he knew he had nailed it. Pleased and ecstatic that he was getting a way to get back at his brother for all the tormenting pranks, he didn't have to feign his grin.

Without a word, she stood up and walked away. He had only sighed in relief when he saw Castiel's expression changing from his usual aloofness to sudden bewilderment. Before he could ask, a glass of chilled cola was splattered on his face.

The same woman had conveniently picked it up from a passing waitress's tray and had flung her disappointment at him. Sam hated the remnants of the drink that was already drying into his brother's cropped hair and the way it had soaked in to his shirt and jacket. Oh well, at least she left.

He grabbed a handful of napkins and tried to blot the excess of the annoying carbonated drink. Castiel quietly reached out, placing the tip of his forefinger on his forehead and restoring him to his former dry and comfy self. Sam looked at him incredulously and cautiously glanced around.

All the patrons, employees and the manager were looking at the two of them in dead silence.

Embarrassed out of his wits Sam threw some bills on the table and, grabbing Castiel's hand when the angel didn't budge, pulled him to his feet and dragged him to the exit.

The young woman wasn't far off.

"_**Have a great time in your clandestine indulgence, you perv!"**_ she yelled after them.

Sam didn't know it was possible to turn any redder. Its amazing just how much the blood vessels under the skin around one's cheeks can dilate under the right kind of emotional trigger…

They were back at the motel in no time. There was still no sign of the Impala and it started to worry Sam. His brother better not has done anything stupid.

Castiel was preoccupied pressing his- actually Sam's- fingers to his- the giant's- forehead and healing the newest formed lumps that were a result from walking into low door beams and roofs due to his sudden height gain overnight. And that was speaking literally. He would need to get accustomed to it soon if he didn't want to be stuck clearing away the painful lumps on the gentle giant's forehead that were born every time he happened to strike his current vessel's face against low-hanging construction thriftiness.

"_Sam, I want you to know how much I appreciate your patience with your abnormal height in a world where everything must appear scaled down to you."_ Castiel stated solemnly as Sam looked at him in flabbergasted surprise.

"_Uh- yeah… Thanks Cas. You'll get used to it, don't worry."_

"_I certainly hope so."_

The angel and the hunter spend time doing research and exchanged their extensive knowledge to discuss some unsolved mysteries of earlier periods. Sam wondered if Gabriel had something to do with those tales.

Castiel wanted to fly around the world and visit areas and people he were concerned about, the ones who had been entrusted under his responsibility for times other than looking out for his ward. Sam was dead against it.

He didn't want anyone to see the angel teleporting around in his shell. He'd have a hard time explaining if some poor unfortunate soul happened to barge in one of the times the angel would be 'zapping' around.

The angel, being the surprisingly soft-hearted soul he was, relented to his request and resorted to share some of his eons old wisdom with him. Castiel decided to stay in with him trying to come to terms with the situation and also plan on how to get back at the Trickster.

Besides, the angel noted with appreciation, Sam Winchester was a person who enjoyed a good talk. Perhaps he could make some enquiries about Dean's unworldly habits while he was still at it.

No sooner than he had decided on it, the distinct rumble of the engine of his current vessel's brother's beloved steed could be heard rumbling close by and he decided to refrain from asking for the time being. Sam sighed in relief to hear his brother coming back. He hoped that his brother's sanity would be still intact.

The door slammed open with such force that the entire room shook. Dean stood outside with the mother of all bitch-faces ever known to have been manifested. It was unnatural to see such a deep expression of hatred and remorse on Jimmy Novak's face. The brothers hadn't been with Jimmy for a long time and Castiel wasn't exactly the ideal model for displaying the wide variety of human emotions.

"_**You!"**_ Dean pointed one of Jimmy's fair-colored fingers at the angel who was currently occupying his brother's body.

"_Me?"_ Castiel echoed in his usual confused manner.

"_**Yeah, you!"**_the hunter barked angrily.

"_What do you want of me, Dean?"_

" '_What do you want of me, Dean?''_ Dean mimicked with the petulance of a miffed toddler. _**"Thanks to you, I missed out on a really hot date!"**_

"_I wish you wouldn't use my vessel for your iniquitous activities, Dean. Please let me hear that you haven't engaged in any unscrupulous acts while you were out."_

"_**Iniquitous-shminiquitous! Thanks to your hallowed be thy man reputation, I was dragged into a church and was nearly forced to preach in today's evening service!"**_

"_Dean, just calm down."_ Sam intervened on behalf of the befuddled angel. Castiel stared at his ward in a perplexed manner, his features nearly looking pained.

"_**I will not calm down! I don't want to be Jimmy goody-two shoes my whole life, you hear me?!"**_

"_Alright, that's enough man! Tell us what happened."_ Sam pressed on with his unmovable persuasive powers and his seething brother finally relented.

After grabbing a beer and downing half of its contents at one go (much to Castiel's chagrin) the older hunter finally sat down on one of the beds and waited till his breathing evened out.

He couldn't even last five minutes as he angrily pulled his arms out of the trench-coat's sleeves and tossed the blanketing piece of attire away. Still not satisfied, he more or less ripped off the tie and nearly tore off the jacket he was wearing underneath the overcoat in a nearly singular, indiscernible motion and proceeded to toss them on the bed.

"_I don't get how you wear all this crap all the time" _he muttered as he stretched his legs and sat down again.

Sam (still in Dean's body) and Castiel (still in Sam's body) quietly sat down on the other bed so that they were facing Dean (still in Jimmy's body).

"_What happened?"_ Sam egged him again.

Dean took a long breath as he arranged all the protests and grievances in a neat flowchart in his mind.

"_After I left the motel, I kept on driving till I came across a diner on the border between the next town and this one. I found the menu to my liking and ordered my usual breakfast favorites with black coffee. The waitress was pretty and polite. Not that I was looking for anything from her… she was the kind and respectable type and I don't normally bother to go after them since they usually have a picket-fence life already._

"_I was digging into my breakfast and wondering why I was particularly enjoying the burger patty when someone slid into the seat beside me. I looked up and saw striking blue eyes which spoke volumes without their owner actually uttering a word._

"_I couldn't believe my luck. A busty blonde chick first thing in the morning. Perhaps Jimmy was a pretty experienced brunette before or it was my own talents seeping through the confines of his body… either way, I had found what I wanted without having to go through any trouble at all. Not every day that this happens…_

"_She was not dressed like one of those typical scary churchy orthodox dames, so I never knew to expect what happened next. She tentatively reached for my hand and after lifting it up to her lips, placed a kiss on it. I swear it was tears that I saw brimming over her mascara-drenched eye-lashes as her lips began to quiver and in the next moment, she scared the living daylights out of me by bawling like a banshee!_

"_I panicked, thinking where I'd met her earlier and tried to recollect what must have happened between us, when I suddenly remembered I was not myself, literally. So there was no way she could have been a rerun of my earlier episodes. I sighed in relief but that was not to last long either._

"_She suddenly fell on her knees and, with my hand still held firmly in hers, she pressed in to her forehead and cried in a ear-piercing pitch saying she was a sinner and that she deserved eternal punishment for all her previous escapades. She begged for my mercy and wept hysterically, all while giving a pretty clear view of her ample bosom._

"_I was dumbfounded. Before I could tell her it was all a misunderstanding, her cell phone beeped and she answered, never letting go of my hand, saying that she had found the prophet and they could all be saved._

"_In less than five minutes, a dozen or so chicks and dudes barged into the diner crying out to the heavens for salvation and mercy. They seemed ecstatic to have found me and didn't even let me finish my breakfast as they hoisted me on their shoulders and walked out of the diner. I had to snatch my half-eaten burger from the plate otherwise those nutcases would have surely let me remain starving!_

"_They continued chanting and shouting repenting phrases in Latin as we presently arrived at a small community hall just a few yards away from the diner across the road. I had thankfully finished my burger during the trip and when they finally set me down on a throne-like chair, I had the freedom and mobility of both hands._

"_It turned out that the provocatively dressed girl from earlier who had slid into my booth had witnessed Cas appearing out of nowhere while she was in a heroin-induced haze in a dark alley. She was all praises for the prophet who had "bestowed her with wisdom and strength" before vanishing again._

"_She blamed it all on her drugged state but after she dreamt of this 'prophet' a couple of times, she was unnerved and decided that if she ever chanced upon him again, she'd give up all her old ways and get her friends and extended family saved too._

"_You have no idea how I saved my ass from being forcibly made to preach to a group of stoned and happily smashed hippies."_

Dean fell quiet at the end of his recounting. He looked a little sad, like a puppy deprived of a meaty bone. It soon vanished as he threw an accusing glare at the stoic-faced of his brother's physical body which currently housed a different soul.

"_**You got anything to say about this?"**_

Castiel took on a serious bearing as Sam's countenance changed. The younger Winchester's body seemed a good substitute for the angel's original vessel as Sam's and Castiel's expressions went hand in hand.

"_I believe you are talking about Magdalene. She is the only one who fits your description about our first meeting."_ Castiel answered solemnly before he broke into a soft smile.

Dean grew even angrier at the merry response of the angel.

"_Thank you Dean. Father will be pleased that you took on my duties while I am unfit for the responsibilities he entrusted me with."_

"_Just go to hell, Cas."_

"_Even though I already have, for you, those words uttered are still blasphemy Dean."_

Dean couldn't decide what was making him even more monstrously pissed than before- the angel's insistence on correcting his usage of the English language, or the silly simpering his brother was subjecting to his handsome (not delicate, mind you!) features.

"_Gabriel, you son of a bitch…"_ He muttered indiscernibly lest the angel start on another grammar crusade, _"… wait till I get my hands on you."_

He decided he was going to roast the annoying Trickster's elusive butt on a spit in a bonfire made from holy oil.

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